Your Ass Smells Like Ass
“You point it at a group of people and it’ll obliterate everything in its path.” She said disgusted.
“Oh baby, it ain’t that bad, just a bit of gas.” He lifted one cheek off of the perfectly contoured couch cushion and let another one go.
“Beau, you’re fucking disgusting, Jesus Christ, why did I marry you?” Her eyes were watering now. She stood up and opened a window hoping that the smell of the pulp mill across the street would cover the smell of her husbands rotting ass.
“Because you luuuuve me.” He took a big gulp of his beer and let out a belch followed up by another sphincter ripping fart. “And I knocked you up.”
“God, I can’t believe I actually had sex with you.” She shivered.
“And you do it every night too.” He smirked and motioned for her to come over. She smiled back. He was disgusting but he did know how to fill a void. She sat on his lap and let him fondle her saggy tits.
In the heat of the moment another gas attack hit. “Aw for fuck sakes Beau.” She waved her hand, hoping to swat the almost think stech away. “She got off him and pulled out a cigarette. If she was going to fuck him she had to have something close to her nose to alleviate the smell.
She stuck the dart in her mouth and pulled out the lighter. Another ripper, she couldn’t get it lit quick enough, and then…
They couldn’t find the gas leak, actually, they couldn’t even find a gas source. The fire department determined that somehow a cloud of methane gas had settled into the area around the trailer but had all burnt up in the explosion along with Tracy and Beaufort Prast.