Tag Archives: Twisted Fairytale

#Saturday Shorts, April 30, 2011

Maleficent, Dorothy and the Italian Rabbit’s Hole


Near a quiet English stream on a quiet English day was a quiet English girl thinking quiet English thoughts. As she was thinking these quiet thoughts, she came across a hole, a rather curious hole at the base of an ancient elm. She was a curious little girl and as a curious little girl she had a propensity for staring down strange holes at the bases of elderly elm trees.


Suddenly a rabbit raced up behind her, “Fuori del mio bambino di strada. Sono in ritardo!”


“Oh my!” She said startled and jumped aside.


“Grazie!” he said and politely tipped his hat before disappearing down the strangely curious rabbit hole.


“I believe he was supposed to say, ‘I’m late! I’m late!’ or some such thing?” said a voice from above. There on a branch sat a very small man in a very large hat.


“Merlin’s the name.” He said, jumping down to offer a greeting.


“My name is Dorothy.” The little girl replied matter-of-factly, bending down to take his outstretched hand.


“Dorothy. Dorothy! Oh my, that just won’t do!” He exclaimed. “That just won’t do.”


“But that is my name.” She frowned.


“Yes, yes.” He rambled, “but it still won’t do. Tell me, how do you feel about wind? Oh, nevermind, nevermind.” He pulled a wand from beneath his cloak, “Oh, don’t go in there.” He said pointing to the rabbit hole, then tapped himself on the head.


She looked at the hole then back again, but he was merely a thought. Dorothy shrugged and continued merrily along the stream with her newly empty head.




Enchanted enchantments I make you all mine!

No happily ever afters, no kisses divine.

All magic on earth shall be crushed in my grasp,

and true love shan’t conquer, but fail in my wrath


Lightening rappelled from the angry skies while the witch sang. She released a loud cackle making the forest cower in fear. Every living thing that could escape did, even mighty oaks attempted to uproot and run only to come crashing down in defeat.


Enchanted enchantments no wishes come true,

wolves will eat children, by ones and by twos.

Flutes and gold lamps will have wishes no more

all charmed magic trinkets shall fall dead at my door


“Hello Maleficent,” Merlin said, having been watching amusedly from a mole hole. “At it again I see?” She stopped in mid-verse. Merlin popped from the hole. “You know Sorceress, if you wish to be rid of her, you must try much harder.”


“But,” she stumbled, “the rabbit hole.”


“Not this time. Did you think you could change the tale without my noticing? Aurora, Snow White, Alice. I will always keep her safe no matter how many times you changer her name, no matter how many times you re-write the story she will always be saved.”


She turned away, “Yes,” She quietly plotted, “but has she ever been to Kansas?” Merlin of Oz was already one step ahead.